FreeRange Kids

We thought this is an interesting movement, and good food for thought.  Check it out!

http://freerangekids.wordpress.com/

Read Full Post »

A letter to parents about Thanksgiving

www.understandingprejudice.org/teach/thanksgiv.htm

Thanksgiving presents a special challenge to school teachers who want to discuss the holiday without resorting to biased information about Native American history and culture. To prepare parents for an anti-bias curricular approach, educators may wish to use or adapt the letter below.

Dear Parents:

As a part of our anti-bias curriculum, we are taking a careful look at how we discuss and celebrate Thanksgiving with students. As you may know, many Native American images found on Thanksgiving cards, decorations, and school materials are very stereotypic. They are often based on a “composite” view of Native Americans rather than on accurate and diverse Native American lifestyles and traditions. As a consequence, Thanksgiving imagery serves to teach and reinforce children’s misinformation and stereotypic thinking about Native Americans, laying a foundation for later prejudice.

Moreover, the story of Thanksgiving is usually told from only one side — that of the European pilgrims who came to America. Rarely is it told from the perspective of the people who were already here. As a result, the role played by Native Americans in helping the pilgrims to survive is often downplayed or ignored. To many Native Americans today, Thanksgiving is a day of mourning because it is a reminder that in return for their help, they were repaid with theft of their land and the genocide of their people.

What, then, do we propose to do? We do not advocate the elimination of Thanksgiving from our curriculum. Instead, we strive to help children understand that Thanksgiving means different things to different people. We will explain that some families celebrate Thanksgiving and others do not, and we will explain why (in language appropriate for children). We will also discuss how Thanksgiving cards and decorations sometimes misrepresent Native Americans and lead them to feel hurt or offended.

What we teach about Thanksgiving is part of a larger effort to help students learn accurate information about Native Americans of the past and present. Our goal is to counter misleading portrayals in children’s books, television shows, and movies (e.g., Westerns), so that students do not acquire stereotypes that promote racism later in life. As part of this effort, we do not permit students to role-play cowboys and Indians (the historic enemy of Indians was not cowboys, but the U.S. government — some of the first cowboys were actually Indians). Furthermore, we want to make sure students understand that being an Indian is not a role, but part of a person’s identity.

If you are not sure what your child or children think about Native Americans, this Thanksgiving may be a good time to find out. You might ask questions such as:

 

• “What do you know about Native Americans?”
• “Would you like to have a Native American friend?”
• “Where do Native Americans live today?” (most live off reservations)
• “Can Native Americans vote in U.S. elections?” (yes, they are citizens)

For Thanksgiving, you might also consider giving a multicultural book about Native Americans or other groups. As we give thanks this season, we hope you will find ways within your family to reinforce these lessons and help instill in our children an appreciation and accurate understanding of all cultures.

Sincerely,

[Name]
[Title]

Read Full Post »

How to Talk to a Child who is Being a Bully

When confronted with evidence of being a bully, your child or student may respond “I wasn’t being a bully, we were having a fight.”  When faced with this justification, here are some questions you may ask your child to elicit a discussion of what it means to be a bully.  We believe that in this situation yelling at your child or punishing them in some other manner is not helpful.  Children are inherently kind.  Help your child see what it means to be unkind. 

1.  What were you fighting over?
2. Was it a fair fight?  If it was a physical fight, do you out-weigh, or are you older than the other child?  If it was a verbal fight, was it fair?  Were you saying mean things just to be mean?
3. What did you want the outcome to be?  What did you expect to happen? What actually happened instead?
4. Looking back on it, was it really a fight, or were you being a bully?
5. What can you do differently next time to change the outcome of the situation?
6. If you were being a bully, how can you make amends to the child you bullied?  Can you offer an apology?  Can you sit next to them at lunch tomorrow?  Can you smile and say hi?  Can you walk with them to school?  For younger children, can you arrange a play date?  What can you do to make up for being a bully?

Read Full Post »

Things Not to Say if Your Child is Being Bullied

If your child is being bullied, your first instinct may be to make light of it, in order to help your child or student feel better.  Do not do this.  The most important thing you can do is listen, until you have the whole story – or as much of the story as you are going to get.  After listening, you and your child can decide together on an appropriate course of action. 

Parents make common miss-steps when they say:

• Don’t be so sensitive
• You take things way to personally
• Be a man
• Be a big girl
• Big boys don’t cry
• Stand up for yourself
• Hit him (or her) back
• You’re blowing this out of proportion
• Don’t be such a baby

As good as your intentions are, these phrases discount your child’s story, and may prevent your child from coming to you in the future.  Listen.  If your child believes he or she is being bullied, it is important.  Attempting to make light of it is not going to lighten their load, and will often have the opposite affect.

Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),

Chief Robert and Terri Lynn TallTree
www.thetalltrees.com

“Teach us love, compassion and honor…that we may heal the Earth, and heal each other.”   – Ojibwe prayer

Read Full Post »

Honoring Our Elders

Here’s a picture of us with Terri’s Dad, Chet Blood.

We love you Dad!

Thinking of Dad reminds us of the generations that have gone before us, and how they have done so much to make this world a better place. As Native Americans we have a strong tradition of honoring our elders, as do many other ethnic groups in the United States and throughout the world. It’s so important, now more than ever, to thank our parents and grandparents for the people that we’ve become, and for the sacrifices that they have made. 

May we always walk in a way that makes our ancestors proud and happy.

Read Full Post »

How could anyone

Shaina Noll (songwriter: Libby Roderick)

 

Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),

Chief Robert and Terri Lynn TallTree
www.thetalltrees.com

“Teach us love, compassion and honor…that we may heal the Earth, and heal each other.”   – Ojibwe prayer

Read Full Post »

Anger Management

When we did our parent program in Lenexa, Kansas this past Sunday there was one couple that really inspired us.  There was a woman who came back in after our program.  She said moments before she and her husband got in their car, and he looked at her and said “I yell too much don’t I?”  She nodded her head, looked at him and said “I get angry too much don’t I?”  He nodded his head. It takes so much courage to self-reflect like that. What an awesome thing! We’re each of us learning and growing as we go, and when we honestly look at our limiting beliefs and patterns of behavior, we step into a bigger, better life. We let more love in.

The Hopi Indians have a proverb that says “Do not let anger poison you.”  Is it possible that sometimes our anger poisons our relationship with our children?

Here’s a picture of us with our clan matriarch, Robert’s mom, Naomi.  She is a powerful, loving presence and she has taught us much about relationships, and our relationships with our own children and grandchildren.

Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),

Chief Robert and Terri Lynn TallTree
www.thetalltrees.com

“Teach us love, compassion and honor…that we may heal the Earth, and heal each other.”   – Ojibwe prayer

Read Full Post »

Children Learn What They Live

By Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.
If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.
If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.
If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.
If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.
If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.
If children live with fairness, they learn justice.
If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.
If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.

Copyright © 1972 by Dorothy Law Nolte

Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),

Chief Robert and Terri Lynn TallTree
www.thetalltrees.com

“Teach us love, compassion and honor…that we may heal the Earth, and heal each other.”   – Ojibwe prayer

Read Full Post »

Devils Tower National Monument – A Teachable Moment

If you are a teacher or parent looking for a good way to tie in Indian Education with American History, Geology, and Geography, then teach your children about Devils Tower National Monument (Bear Lodge).

Click How is Devils Tower A Sacred Site to American Indians? for a nice overview.

Here’s a picture of Terri on our most recent visit.  We are always in awe and humbled when we leave this sacred and historical place.

When our son was much younger we took him here after Sundance. He has always been a very loving person, and he has such a gentle heart. He saw how quietly and respectfully we carried ourselves, and he did the same. (As parents, we understand that our children learn by observation and imitation. We don’t have to holler at them to get them to do “what we want.” We must be accountable for our own actions.) When we leaned our bellies up against the Earth, he did also…and the overwhelming love he experienced moved him to tears. It takes a lot of courage to be able to cry – he has the heart of a warrior. He will always remember that the Earth is our home, and that we are all connected.

Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),

Chief Robert and Terri Lynn TallTree
www.thetalltrees.com

“Teach us love, compassion and honor…that we may heal the Earth, and heal each other.”   – Ojibwe prayer

Read Full Post »

A Time of Change and Healing

A friend of ours who works in the field of education called us after reading our blogs last week.  She was feeling overwhelmed by the challenges of bullying.  It was bringing up memories from her own childhood, and that brought her to tears.

When you’re reading about a topic (such as bullying) and you begin to have recall experiences associated with emotion – sadness, anger, depression, helplessness or despair – it can be a gift. It means you have been carrying past experiences in your cellular memory, and are now releasing them. It means you can put things in perspective, and have the opportunity to move forward in a lighter and more loving way.

This is a time of change and healing. As children, many of us weren’t protected by the adults who loved us in our lives. That does not mean they didn’t love us. As adults, we have the power to protect our children, and the power to teach them to protect each other.. That is a beautiful thing.

Gakina-awiiya (We Are All Related),

Chief Robert and Terri Lynn TallTree
www.thetalltrees.com

“Teach us love, compassion and honor…that we may heal the Earth, and heal each other.”   – Ojibwe prayer

Read Full Post »